Did it work?

Looks like life is going to go back to normal now that Sean's returned. As soon as he returned, I immediately had Mom telling me I should go and sign on at the Job Centre to claim unemployment. I don't know why she bothers to preach that to me because she knows I'm not going to do it. Why would I? Afterall, the only reason she wants me to is so that she can have the money to buy more food. Food for her and Sean. Sean claims that it's for "all of us", but it's actually just for them two. At the BBQ on the beach a few days back, Sean was talking about how they'd spend close to £100 on food for "us all". Why so much? Before he came here, Mom only used to spend about £40-£50 on food. Why has it now increased by a lot? Obviously, Sean's a greedy bastard. He claims unemployment...so if Mom is hard up on cash for food, then why the fuck doesn't HE give her his money? Why do I have to claim cash that won't be mine in the end so that he can buy even more food for him and Mom? It's complete crap.

I've not been having that much of a good day today. A good friend of mine, Vicky, came online to tell me "bye for good", and that she was planning on killing herself because she can't deal with life. So, this was yet another attempt at trying to talk someone out of suicide. Did I succeed? I have no idea. I really hope I did. I've only had to really attempt it one other time, and I failed at it. I was being as kind as possible on that attempt. So, I went with a more aggressive attempt this time, telling her that she's really selfish if she kills herself. In a way, it is pretty selfish killing yourself because if you think about it, you're hurting the feelings of good friends, as well as any family that may care about you. Sure, you'd be dead, but what about the people you're leaving behind? They have to live with the pain for the rest of their lives because you were selfish enough to kill yourself...showing that the only person you care about is yourself. I wonder if anyone actually bothers thinking about the damage they're doing to the lives of the people they leave behind for the selfish act?

She was telling me that only a few people would really care if she did it, but that's the point. It's nicer to have a few GREAT friends, than 100s of not so great friends. Given the choice, what would you prefer to have? A few great friends who care deeply about you, or 100s of friends that probably won't care if you kill yourself in the long run? I'd personally prefer a few great friends who care deeply about me. I have no idea what Vicky is up to now. She wouldn't talk to me afterward, and eventually just told me "I'll talk to you later", then signed offline. Will she really be back later, or is she going ahead with her selfish act? I really don't know. Makes me wish I could be with her pyshically to make sure that she won't do anything fucking stupid, but sadly, she's too far away. All I can do is hope that I got through to her. If not, then that's another good friend I've lost...and it'll show me how she really feel about me.